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A spirit of urgency!

Have you ever had a spirit of urgency about living life to the fullest and making every second count for an important purpose, your passion?   Perhaps that sounds a little intense, and maybe you are right, yet I’ve had that feeling for a good part of my life.  The problem was that I felt that so much of my life was pushing me to sidestep and I never made much progress in the direction of my purpose.  I have so much to do and time is short- no matter how long I live!

I do not know what happened, yet a couple of months ago I “hit” something, figuratively speaking, and all of a sudden that feeling of external things pushing me sideways became too much and I began pushing back.  After 36 years of feeling pushed around, invisible, and wondering if what I believed about myself were true or not, I gave a big, old invisible shove back!  I stood up and decided I am going places before I leave this planet!  I have a lot to give and I am giving it- not later, although I plan to do that, too!  But now!  I am doing things now!

First, order began to improve in my home.  Then came taking care of me, even when that looked like giving up some comfort to get there.  After a couple of weeks, changes began to snowball, and life is just different.  I cannot go back; don’t want to, could not force me!

My children will still grow up whether I work myself into an early grave or not, so I choose not!

My children will still leave home in a matter of a few years whether I give them every waking hour or I choose to steal a little time back to create something for myself to hold onto or be after they move on, so I am creating that!   I choose to make a life of purpose starting now, which (I hope) will last decades and from which I will leave carrying no regrets.  I make peace with trouble from the past as it manifests, and let it go.  I do not need to carry it; my arms are full without it.

Life will seem precious when I look back and remember where I have been and what I did, or it will not:  I choose to make it precious by noticing every bit of bliss, and making memories every day!

I can choose to pay the price and create health now, or indulge in “poor me” for a little while longer and experience far fewer years on this earth- I think paying up now sounds better, so I am paying up:  taking care of my body, nurturing my mind, creating new skills, building new relationships, and strengthening existing ones.

I am asking thousands of questions.  It seems I never stop.  And, I don’t just ask- I want answers.  From me, from my spouse, my children, friends, the Internet, from every source I can find.  I have moved out of patterns that kept me hostage, stuck, neurotic, and alone in a constant crowd of people!  I proved my capability; my mind.  I began proving my power over my physical experience by changing my health (and, although I am not done, I know I will soon reach the goal I set before I became an adult).

I am a leader, not a follower.  I am unconventional.  If that matters to you it is your concern, not mine.  Like Wil Smith’s character in the movie The Pursuit of Happyness (Columbia Pictures Industries, 2006), I am not taking no for an answer, even if I walk through a little fire to find my dream, and my children will see and hear that message loud and clear- now, before they leave the home nest and start out in the world.

Perhaps I mentioned it before?  2 Timothy 1:7  says, “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.”  I have no time for cowardice!  I have work to do- at home and abroad. 

People all over the world hurt.  I know a little about that; yet, when I have more, what business would I have sitting alone, motionless, when someone else is suffering and I have any power to end or alleviate it?  No business. No excuses.  I do not want any.  So, tackling my own limitations became a must.  I cannot serve others if I am half-dead.  I cannot serve others without joy.  I get to choose what makes me happy and live that.  Only then will I manage to be good for others. 

I love the examples of people- well-known and not- who step out and create wonderful things, which benefit someone else and changes the social climate of the planet. 

Places to be inspired?  Well, I mentioned sports flicks.  How about scripture- not just mine, either.  Every branch of philosphy says something about getting over the self and being for others.  Want more? 

Do hard things, by Alex and Brett Harris

Grameen Foundation or Grameen America

Heifer International

American Red Cross


If none of those “speak to you,” take a virtual world tour online!  Learn some thing new, meet someone new.  Millions of possibilities for every human on the planet; all of them proverbially screaming, “Pick me!  These people need you!” 

I hope I’ll bump into you, out there in the wide, wide world! 

Best of luck, Shoshannah

P.S. Make it a great day!


About dragonflywingz

Christian, wife, mom of seven amazing teens and kiddles, home educator, homemaker, artist, college student, romantic, dreamer. I love for poetry, music, art, fashion and everything that makes life beautiful profoundly-(sigh!)

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